Dear Partner

I never dreamed of having someone to be with for the rest of my life. Of course, I never dreamed that we’d be together until now. After so many years of being together, we’ve had so many bad times that outnumbered the good times. We both questioned our love for each other and we both hated each other for that. How come we are still sharing our home and our son? You can’t imagine being with me and sometimes I think life is easy without you!

I remember all the times when you said that it’s better if we part ways. And to my dismay, I told you I respect your decision and it’s better to get separated while we still have respect for each other. I also can’t imagine being with the person who loathed me and who wanted me out of his life. You said life is easier without me and I think you’re right. I also thought about that many times. Oh, see the last sentence of the first paragraph.

I also don’t believe in the reason or the fact that couples must stay because of their kids. Why prolong a useless relationship, right? Both of us can have our own lives and still be great loving parents to our ever dearest baby. Yep, this is both our thought so I know that if we part ways, a part of us will be happy. At least, I hope.

But then, what happened? This drama you and I both created is like the reruns of a melodramatic, mushy TV program. See, we’re not that sweet and dramatic yet we are caught up in this drama. I want this drama to end because it doesn’t make any sense — unless of course, I can be an actor in the future. And, if I’m attending acting workshops maybe I’d pursue drama. After all, you’re the best actor in the world and you’re my guru who taught me lots of drama. I might win an Oscar and a Golden Globe for being your apprentice.

I’m still thinking about the time we met. You said you don’t want to take a chance at love ever again but you did with me. I also said that I’m okay being with myself for the rest of my life. No one knows what happened but every time we plan to separate, it just didn’t seem to happen. Do you remember how peaceful we are when we haven’t met each other?  We both miss those days.

You are strong and I love that about you. I know that you also admire my strength for holding on and for loving you for who you are. I remember these words that you wrote on the small book you’ve given me. And you also said that you’re looking forward to more adventures with me. Come on, how can we have wonderful adventures if we are acting like crazy lunatics?

Tell me now, how do we separate ways? And though you leave for a couple of days, you always come back with a little smile that turns into a grin and a big smile. I think I am used to your uncanny, grouchy ways. Are you used to living without me, my one and only fatty? I know you’re not ready because for the nth time, you’re still here. I’m not pushing you away but I just wanted to let you know that life without me is boring. And, life without you? It is heaven and I’m just kidding. Life without you is pointless because you’re a fucking exclamation point.

You’ll always be my fatty acid even if I hate you at times. I can imagine you all smiles now, you ill-tempered dick head. No more drama, okay? Hugs!

❤ Your OAO

*** This is a general letter intended for couples but for some reason, it also fits me and my crazy partner. 😀

Passion

It’s been awhile since my last post and share, so let the passion begin now. This short poem is dedicated to all lovers, parents and most especially to soon to be parents. 🙂

Constellations above are watching over us

While you and me are faraway

Shining with love that is built to last

Brighter than anything in the milky way.

And then we both succumb

To our eternal burning fire

A magic fruit in the womb

Created with an ardent desire.

– TLL

 

 

 

 

 

Why You Should Find Time to Do What You Love

We are all busy. We all get overwhelmed at one point or another. We have lots of things to do and even if we prioritize, chances are, it looks like time is never enough. True, but we could always find time to what we love if we really want to. For me, I always find time to write (blog, journal and snail mail). I do this before sleeping or upon waking up for at least 5 to 15 minutes. At least, I have 15 happiest minutes of my life before the day ends! 😀

Writing, like any other passion and hobby, takes time and dedication. Be it dancing, gardening, fencing, skydiving or whatever you think you would do, it’s going to take a bit of your time if not too much. But this is the only moment where time stops. This is the time when you feel very fearless because you are in your own element. You are doing what you love the most and you deserve it. You deserve good times in this lifetime.

Parents and people who dedicated their time taking care of other people can have an excuse to this. But if you’re doing otherwise, basically there’s no excuse not to do what you love doing. Life is too short to be stuck in something that you don’t like to do. Having a work that you don’t love but gives you money is another story but most people do it to survive. However, if you can have the work of your dreams, go ahead and take it. If it’s hard to find, do something to achieve it and be open to other stuff as well.

At the end of the day, we all feel tired and used up. But if we do what we do best which is also the one thing that we like doing, we’d feel fulfilled even when we’re exhausted to death. Remember, one of the good ways to be fulfilled and happy is to do what you love. We are still alive so the good thing is, we still have this wonderful chance to do what we love doing. Let us not miss this wonderful chance.

If we don’t find time to do what we love, we will never find it. 🙂

“Life will always get busy, make time to do the things you love.” ― Lailah Gifty Akita, Beautiful Quotes

What are your Top 10 Great Things?

It’s been awhile since I’ve posted a list. I’ve been damn busy and I guess, overwhelmed with my numerous activities the past month! So, I decided to start posting a list again. I’ll try to post every Thursday/Friday, at least twice a month. Forgive my cliches for now. Share me your list in the Comments section. Let me know what you think. 🙂

Top 10 Great Things That I Lurve
1.  Icebreakers – delicious!
2.  Sunshine – reminds me to become one, too.
3.  Shade of trees – relaxing!
4.  Eggs – fast cooking ‘coz I’m lazy!
5.  Seeing planes in the sky – what a beautiful sight!
6.  Long Walks – my favorite exercise!!!
7.  Solitude – my so-called meditation…
8.  Cat and Dog – my “cute” family 🙂
9.  Drawing – bec. I feel I have more time!
10. Music – bec. I can feel my time stops and I love it.
What’s yours? ‪#‎greatthings‬ to keep u ‪#‎happy‬ 🙂

Breakup on Christmas Day

How splendid it was to have a breakup on Christmas Day! How great and surreal the feeling was! That’s how I am feeling right now on a sarcastic level to the nth power. Nothing beats the nostalgic feeling of being away from your family and longing for them while your special someone is so eager to end forever with you. Okay, I understand that to begin with there was no forever. Maybe it was just a course of hallucination in my head. A hopeless, romantic moron that I am who built a perfect world in my own world. Yeah, pathetic is the perfect word to describe me — a foolish, vulnerable pathetic.

With his firm voice, he said that he cannot see forever with me and that I do not listen to him that much. I uttered the word “OK” to emphasize that I understood even though he’s hard to fathom compared to a normal human being. I think we just have a different language of love so we didn’t understood each other. Different wavelengths, different views, different opinions, different everything. Or maybe, it is a form of misunderstanding or miscommunication between us. I understand that boys communicate to each other by conveying information and girls communicate to bond. With us, communication is dead and through his own words, very hard and frustrating. So, when he said that he does not want to work things out, “OK” was all I have to say. Though we explained our sides and sentiments to each other, for him it was better to put an end to what we have started — to which I said I respected his decision.

One week to go and 2013 will bid goodbye. I am with the leaves falling from the trees. I am also with the raindrops falling from the sky and for everything that just comes and goes away naturally. No matter how melancholic this Christmas is, I am happy that for once in my life, I have become vulnerable again. True love must be free and not to be coerced or forced. If it wants to go, let it go. I am hurt and so is he. We are all humans wanting to have freedom within our range. I know I have given him the love and the freedom that he so much wanted. A heartbreak for me yet a wonderful Christmas gift for him.

No regrets, no ill feelings, no hangovers. Just a fresh new start for the coming year. I hope he feels the same way, too.

The Christmas Flight

This video made me smile and I am sure you’d smile, too. This is why real giving never fails. 🙂

In Silence

In the dark

I shivered from afar

For you are no longer mine.

The fragile glass which

Is my heart and mirror

Was broken into pieces.

You drifted apart from me

And love plummeted to its death.

But I am here standing still,

Reflecting the shattered pieces

Reminiscing our lost past.

In time I have learned

That to love you in silence

I have found peace

Because no one

Owns you there

But me.

* Daily Prompt: Unexpected